The Eulogies

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Find out what product is best for your cycle

Confession: Women have period panties.

Not the kind you bleed into on purpose (although those are cool, too), but the ones you remember buying and loving, which have now been stained by a leak. Completely ruined. And a sad reminder of what used to be.

Hilariously, period panties became a joke between my mom, sister and me when we were growing up. If I was in a foul mood for no particular reason I would blurt out that I had my “period panties” on, and we’d relax knowing my panic about the cheddar cheese running out was hormonalnot homicidal.

As most women would confess, panties aren’t the only thing compromised by a leak. So, I give you The Eulogies: farewells to three precious possessions that my period has seriously fucked up.


My Car Seat

You were my first car. A 1999 Volkswagen Beetle that I accidentally drove for over a week without an oil pan (whoops!). You were my blessed sanctuary for listening to Death Cab for Cutie too loudly while making out with my high school crush. Your light grey front seat took me to my first job interview. My first prom.

Until one night, my period betrayed you.  

I was heading home when suddenly I had that familiar feeling. You know, the one when you realize your menses are pouring out of you at an unstoppable rate and your tampon is just sitting there drowning like “I tried! Save yourself!”  

I attempted to cleanse you of The Stain with anything I could find in the garage (Mane ‘n Tail included). But there remained The Stain, staring me in the face for three long years... until the day I finally sold you.

“A coffee stain," I lied. 

$1 Million of Underwear (estimated value)

Pretty much every pair of panties I’ve owned up to using FLEX (shameless promotion) has been compromised. This loss is self-explanatory. I loved you all dearly. Your replacements are NOT YOU.

My Pony

My sister and I had a pony named Vanity growing up. (Yes, we had an actual pony. And no, I didn’t have a super sweet 16 birthday party).

Vanity was a total goddess, but I didn’t exactly enjoy riding her. After my sister was done riding, what I really loved to do was to take all of her tack off and trot bareback into her stall. I would grab the bar above the door and swing off the back of her as she walked forward underneath me.

She was white. My period was red. It happened. Sorry, Austine.

 

 

Is the period product for you?

Find out what product is best for your cycle

  • Your period
  • Your lifestyle
  • Your concerns

Typically, how many days is your period?

How heavy is your flow on your heaviest days?

When did your last period start?

How many weeks do you typically have between periods?

What period product do you use most frequently?

How disruptive can your period be to your life?

What bothers you most about having your period?

What is the one thing you wish you could change about your period?

  • < 2 Days
  • 3 Days
  • 4 Days
  • 5 Days
  • 6 Days
  • 7 Days
  • > 8 Days
LIGHT (1-2 tampons/day)
MEDIUM (3-4 tampons/day)
HEAVY (4-5 tampons/day)
  • < 2 Weeks
  • 3 Weeks
  • 4 Weeks
  • 5 Weeks
  • 6 Weeks
  • 7 Weeks
  • > 8 Weeks
Tampons
Pads
Cup
Discs
Period Panties
Others
Can’t get out of bed
Can’t do certain activities
I mostly feel uncomfortable
Just like any other day
I’m constantly running to the bathroom
I can’t sleep through the night
My work out routine is thrown off
I can’t have sex
I feel uncomfortable
Less cramping
Less odor
Fewer leaks
No risk of TSS
Less waste
If you’re not sure, choose MEDIUM.

All done!

What email would you like your results sent to?

Here is our pick for you!
plan type
Light plan $8
4 Discs per cycle per period
frequency
8 Discs every 2 months
Light Flow Starter Kit
Includes 8 discs + our Getting Started Guide

We will automatically ship 8 discs for $15 every two months starting on . We’ll remind you before we process the next order. You can pause or cancel anytime, online.

plan type
Medium plan $14
8 Discs per cycle per period
frequency
16 Discs every 2 months
Medium Flow Starter Kit
Includes 8 discs + our Getting Started Guide

We will automatically ship 16 discs for $27 every one month starting on . We’ll remind you before we process the next order. You can pause or cancel anytime, online.

plan type
plan $0
Discs per cycle per period
frequency
Discs every months
Flow Starter Kit
Includes discs + our Getting Started Guide

We will automatically ship discs for every starting on . We’ll remind you before we process the next order. You can pause or cancel anytime, online.

Try FLEX with some liners at first.

Sometimes you just feel better with a little backup. FLEX plus liners would be a great combination for you while you transition to FLEX to help guard against leaks until you get the hang of positioning FLEX.

Not ready for membership? Try just one FLEX.